Except for bocce. Two beers. This is my life.
Some people call it Dryuary…and that doesn’t work as a pun, so I hate it and will continue on calling it Sober January like people have done since way back before Jimmy Fallon and Chris Hardwick teamed up to make everything a hashtag.
I’m doing the sober thing this month, except for bocce. Two beers for bocce. This is my life…and it’s not going well.
Two beers because being the water team sounds like a nightmare, and…
Two beers because nobody likes the water team, and…
Two beers is not enough to get anyone into their optimal bocce headspace, and…
Two beers turns into two beers and four hotshots, and…
Two beers and four hotshots turns into two losses, and…
Two beers and four hotshots turns into drinking more than I’m wanting to in this Sober January (except for bocce). This is my life.
But Four Beers.
Four beers puts me in my optimal bocce headspace, and…
Four beers wards off multiple hotshots, and…
Four beers and diminished hotshots turns into two wins.
This is my life.
How does one drink more in order to drink less? Bocce. That’s how.
Thesis: Where (b) is beer, 4(b) < 2(b).
Conclusion: It checks out
“Four drinks, therefore I can.”
Dave’s Stand-up Dates
Dave Sartoris will be at the WIP Theater in Edison Park tonight (1/22) at 10 PM. He performs tomorrow (1/23) at Route 2 Brews in Lowell, IN at 7 PM. Then it’s back to regularly scheduled activity on Thursday, February 18th at The Store (9 PM) and Monday, February 22nd he hosts the Comedy Vault series at The Bedford (8 PM).
Notes on the Artist
Meredith Kachel is a multi-disciplined artist and funny person. There’s too many damn things to list, so please visit her website by clicking on these words. Did you click “these words”? If not, you’re really doing yourself a disservice. Go ahead and click.