Most of what I say and do is intended to be taken with a grain of salt. No, that was not the greatest comeback in bocce history. Nor was that hands down the best shot I’ve ever seen. Your failure to reach the halfway-point does not make me want to smash my head in with the green ball and when I throw a clipboard up in the air in the disbelief? Well, I’m an only child—I’m just looking for attention.
I’ve been drawn to hyperbole my whole life. I like telling stories. I like hearing stories. I like creating stories and it just so happens that American Bocce has become my vehicle for such. It took a little hyperbole to get our first courts and then our first events and then our first leagues. When the words “bocce ball is the greatest game in the world” first hit the proposal we were typing out, Ben and I snickered—and then talked about baseball, basketball, tennis, really anything but bocce ball for the rest of the evening—and then booked that goddamned event.
So if you know me (or have not skipped ahead to paragraph 3 like a crazy person) then you’ll have a hard time taking anything I say as an absolute belief or even completely factual. This gabby preface is A.) further proof that I like to rant and B.) a necessary preface to get to this: I hold genuine conviction in everything I’m about to say.
I actually believe that American Bocce leagues are hands-down the best social sports experience in the country.
I think that a Monday night at Chop Shop provides more camaraderie and community then any attempted mixer or team builder in Chicago. Team T-shirts deter players from going out to bars after their games and that’s why we don’t wear ‘em. There are more women than men registered to our website – and that’s what keep the men signing up. If you’re single, you’ll find a date at our leagues. If you’re in a relationship, you really should use them as a way to stay in touch with your friends.
When you’re playing ping pong and you’re considerably better than your opponent – it sucks. Bowling is expensive and smelly. Cornhole to ABC Leagues is the driving range to Pebble Beach.
Stats make everything better.
Most people aren’t that fun to talk to without a hot shot in them.
There were four bocce courts attached to bars and restaurants in Chicago in 2013 and now there are 16 (and counting) and that’s 100% because of us.
American Bocce will soon have leagues and communities in large cities throughout the country and those leagues will branch off into both social and competitive leagues with winners from all of them chartering a cruise ship for a 4-day bender of bocce and buffets.
If you’re thinking about starting the American Horseshoe Company or the National Bocce Company, don’t. There is something special about what we have and it just won’t work without us.
Oh, and thunder? It’s just The Gods playing Bocce.